I cry to burn the charm of your face from my eyes- just to scream into my pillow at 3 am. Right around the time i get devastated and text you more often than I should. "Are you horny :) *Are you home"
I really don't mean anything.

The only thing I ate today is sadness, I need your nutrients, your between the legs nirvana, and your namaste nasty. And I know you're awake, so answer my text, "Are you hormney ?"

How can I sleep comfortably in abed that's as empty as me? I let you inside. You lit fires instead of setting the butterflies free.

Fuck, i done, too desperate. My head is beating in my chest and I don't remember what that feels like, because I lost my only in your butterfly stomach. "I'm sorry"-send.

I wish I was kissing you, instead of missing you.
I'm tired of feeling sorry Tired of Crying to sleep, I know she isn't better than me, She eats rougher than the hugs I give you. I'm tired of banging on 113. Wait you live in 112.
I'm sick of feeling used' he laughs at my jokes and lays me down like hes afraid to break me-but hes not you. But I cant keep letting you walk into watch you leave. And the only reason Im on your doorstep is because I'm too drunk to admit that I miss you.

I love you, I fucking Love you. Or maybe I'm just too drunk, and want just another reason to cry your name to sleep. You wrote Mine on my neck with your fingertips, just the thought arouses me.

But well I'm done, Other girls would risk getting sick for you, But I've been sick for you, even when I'm sick of you.

I'm done, You're just my past, I've moved on and I found myself another companion, and He holds me tighter with love, more love than you ever gave me.
I gave up on you long back. you're just another memory, Another phone call which i can easily ignore, Another face I look away from.

But the feelings that I used to had for you are no longer there, and for the first time, I really dont care. Because I know what I had and I'm glad you're gone.

Just Dont Tell anyone.

I can be the Secret You wish you did't have to keep.
I can Let you love me quietly, I can let you hold my hands when no one's watching.

I,
can let you kiss me quickly, could let you tremble, could let you fall for me.
Only if you'd do it quietly.

You shall wait for the day when things align, in a straight line. And then I could let you talk to me like a promise, instead of a confession. You shall wait for the day, Only if you can do it with out anyone else knowing.

The day I let you love me out loud. You shall wait for the day you find your voice.
Until then Keep quiet.

To my Bestfriend

I know she has some kind
of mental illness,
I know she is weird,
and that she has an evil smile.
I also know that probably,
I will never ever discover what is
hidden under that messy mass of
brown curly hair.
But i also know that I just love her,
 I love her for who she is
and for who she is for me.

I'm thankful to have you Mariyam Manhal Ajeeb.

The Creepy Poem By him

It is with concealed emotions that I write to thee,
Lest thou find reasons to judge me.
But dear love almost from me gone,
thou has me still by thy love sworn,
I watch thee sleep in all thy manner of charms,
just that thou art absent from mine arms.
And it is which such love found and lost,
that these affections in words I host.

Dear Love, let us together deceive death,
And if we shan't let us sign our last breath,
together, so if  not in life we shall meet,
in death, when death us both greet.
Remember thy vow? That thou shan't let go
On what we as love have come to know.
Let us live a love that would go unheard,
for no poet can do us justice with word.

It is in the solace of thy thoughts that I write,
to thee, for thou remain only right,
Yet my only wrong.
Thou art, in love my swan song,
It is with love that I write to thee,
for it is with love that I wish to remember thee,
Thou art the only love that ever felt right.
And such love, I pray, grace me if might.

The crooked end

She was the devil searching peace, and he was angel craving chaos. it was all vary and fine for one second, but the solely pain her eyes engulf is over all the powers of his anger to overtake. he rules her with his anger and she wept with the fear of losing all that she ever wanted. she let him have all the bits of all the offerings from her poor savings, he expected more with the unsatisfied words. it was more than she could take, it was more pain and more than she could endure. She gave up as he said.

Fit in here, in my palm, in my shadow. don't be bigger than my idea of you, don't be more beautiful than I can accept don't be more human than i am willing you to be, and be quite you're too loud. Quite your dreams, your voice, your hair. Quite your skin, your color. Quite your walk, your eyes, who said you can look at me like that? Who said you can exist without permission?

She gave up, as her last breathed passed, never to love an indecent man again.

Since the day I lost you

She couldn't keep her head up, She spent hours in her room. Screaming at nothing, screaming that you'd come back. For you have gone, too far away and never to return showed your final gestures.
I remember that day like it was yesterday, you left. Slept out of the universe for eternity. i was standing there, around the crowd. everyone were mourning and my heart was dying. the colors were fading and so were my joys.

The news headlines were how i knew that you bid farewell. it was loud and clear when they announced the 19 year old passed away, my 14 year old self died with him. all i could say was 'NO NO' nothing else came out of my timid scared self. i hoped that it was all fake, like a dream, just another dream and id wake up any second and laugh for acting like a sadistic imbecile. only if i could rewind and bring you back. only if there was anything i could do to bring you back. only if it was all a lie and you were just faking to die. and you'd come back to life with that mesmerizing smile and be all 'GOTCHA' for how dramatic my actions were.

I want to say good bye, but i Cant. because i know that you left too early.
I hope i can be thankful one day when life makes sense again.
I hope i can get over the fear of losing someone like you.

Most of all i hope you'd come back to life.

I miss you.